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Reply from Ivone TellezHello everyone,  I have chosen to cover prompt one: gender. I am a cisgender female. My Mexican culture has heavily influenced my gender socialization. The culture focuses on a man’s ability to provide and a woman’s capability of being his support as well as a mother and homemaker. By the time I was an adolescent, I was solely responsible for the upkeep of our home and made to do my brother’s and father’s laundry. My mother was also strict about the ways I presented myself. I was not in charge of my gender expression. I was not allowed to wear makeup, paint my nails, cut my hair short, or dye it a different color. I was always considered a more masculine female because of this. When I turned sixteen, I started questioning why I had to act and present a certain way while my older brother got to do whatever he wanted. I started noticing the gender inequalities. I had to be home by a certain time or was only allowed out for a couple of hours with our friends, while he had no restrictions. I have also seen the difference in the treatment of men and women by guests. For instance, bar guests who are getting cut off are more likely to cause a scene and berate the bartender if they are female. There have also been multiple times where I am expected to act hyperfeminine like being perky and upbeat while the male bartenders can have a more relaxed, authentic demeanor.

Question

Reply from Ivone TellezHello everyone,  I have chosen to cover prompt one: gender. I am a cisgender female. My Mexican culture has heavily influenced my gender socialization. The culture focuses on a man’s ability to provide and a woman’s capability of being his support as well as a mother and homemaker. By the time I was an adolescent, I was solely responsible for the upkeep of our home and made to do my brother’s and father’s laundry. My mother was also strict about the ways I presented myself. I was not in charge of my gender expression. I was not allowed to wear makeup, paint my nails, cut my hair short, or dye it a different color. I was always considered a more masculine female because of this. When I turned sixteen, I started questioning why I had to act and present a certain way while my older brother got to do whatever he wanted. I started noticing the gender inequalities. I had to be home by a certain time or was only allowed out for a couple of hours with our friends, while he had no restrictions. I have also seen the difference in the treatment of men and women by guests. For instance, bar guests who are getting cut off are more likely to cause a scene and berate the bartender if they are female. There have also been multiple times where I am expected to act hyperfeminine like being perky and upbeat while the male bartenders can have a more relaxed, authentic demeanor.

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Solution

Hello Ivone,

Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and insights on gender socialization within your Mexican culture. It's clear that you've had to navigate some challenging gender norms and expectations, particularly in terms of your responsibilities at home and your personal expression.

Your observations about the different expectations and treatment of men and women, both in your personal life and in your work as a bartender, are very insightful. It's unfortunate that such disparities exist, but your awareness of them is the first step towards challenging and changing these norms.

It's commendable that you've begun to question these gender inequalities and norms. This is a crucial part of personal growth and societal change. Keep questioning, keep challenging, and keep being true to yourself. Your experiences and insights are valuable and can help to shed light on these important issues.

Best, [Your Name]

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